1
00:00:01,635 --> 00:00:03,035
[theme music playing]

2
00:00:04,838 --> 00:00:07,838
Hey, do I have trouble
maintaining an
organized work space?

3
00:00:07,874 --> 00:00:10,584
-What?
-Okay, I'm gonna put
"one, rarely."

4
00:00:10,610 --> 00:00:14,350
No, hold up, I'm gonna put
"four, very frequently."

5
00:00:14,381 --> 00:00:16,751
I feel like my work space
is all [bleep] up.

6
00:00:16,783 --> 00:00:18,223
Dad, what are you doing?

7
00:00:18,251 --> 00:00:20,291
Man, I'm filling out
this intake questionnaire.

8
00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:22,020
I'm gonna see
this psychiatrist.

9
00:00:22,055 --> 00:00:23,985
I've been feeling
stressed out lately.

10
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:26,224
Anxious as
a mother [bleep], man.

11
00:00:26,259 --> 00:00:27,789
I think it's
all these mysteries,

12
00:00:27,828 --> 00:00:29,488
these goblins and ghouls.

13
00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:32,129
Dad, I didn't know you were
suffering so much.

14
00:00:32,165 --> 00:00:33,665
I keep it all bottled up.

15
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:36,370
But that's what you gotta do
when you have no friends,

16
00:00:36,403 --> 00:00:38,443
no loved ones,
no support system.

17
00:00:38,472 --> 00:00:40,272
-[Marquess] What?
-Dad!

18
00:00:40,307 --> 00:00:42,707
Oh, one more question
for you, my friends
and loved ones...

19
00:00:42,742 --> 00:00:45,042
And again, thank you
for your support.

20
00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:46,708
Would you say
I'm "quick to startle"?

21
00:00:46,746 --> 00:00:48,706
-Happy hump day, team!
-[shrieks]

22
00:00:48,748 --> 00:00:50,178
Dad!

23
00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:52,247
I'm gonna put "zero, never."

24
00:00:52,285 --> 00:00:54,545
Hey, Yung, thanks again
for last night.

25
00:00:54,588 --> 00:00:56,018
I can't stop
thinking about it.

26
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,256
[spits]

27
00:00:57,290 --> 00:00:59,390
Oh, my God,
are you two [bleep]?

28
00:00:59,426 --> 00:01:00,786
What? No!

29
00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:02,687
Okay. Oral counts though, eh?

30
00:01:02,729 --> 00:01:05,659
Don't act like oral
doesn't count, you two.

31
00:01:05,699 --> 00:01:07,629
We're not having sex!

32
00:01:07,667 --> 00:01:10,397
You'd be lucky to be
with a man like Deezy, Yung.

33
00:01:10,437 --> 00:01:12,237
I think of Deezy like a son.

34
00:01:12,272 --> 00:01:15,342
And who wouldn't want
their son and daughter
to be together?

35
00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:17,235
Man, this is great news.

36
00:01:17,277 --> 00:01:19,007
My depression is lifting.

37
00:01:19,045 --> 00:01:20,845
We have a wedding to plan.

38
00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:22,751
Deezy, say something!

39
00:01:22,782 --> 00:01:24,622
Okay. Okay.

40
00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:26,651
I'm sorry to say that
Yung and I are not
romantically involved.

41
00:01:26,686 --> 00:01:28,686
Last night,
she was kind enough
to bail me out of jail.

42
00:01:28,722 --> 00:01:31,062
Oh, my...
What were you in jail for?

43
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:33,161
Now, don't worry, Marquess,
it wasn't anything bad,

44
00:01:33,193 --> 00:01:35,793
nothing that would discredit
the reputation of
the Mystery Team or Mike.

45
00:01:35,829 --> 00:01:37,659
I was simply
soliciting a prostitute

46
00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:39,557
who turned out to be
an undercover cop.

47
00:01:39,599 --> 00:01:41,329
So, you're telling me
there's not going
to be a wedding?

48
00:01:41,368 --> 00:01:42,698
I'm afraid not.

49
00:01:42,736 --> 00:01:44,796
-Unless you'll have me, Yung?
-No.

50
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:46,138
Worth a try.

51
00:01:46,173 --> 00:01:47,943
Oh, by the way,
you got a new mystery.

52
00:01:47,974 --> 00:01:50,514
You guys have to
do this one
without me, man.

53
00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:54,514
I am so crestfallen
about Deezy and Yung
breaking up, man,

54
00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:57,648
I need to see that
psychiatrist immediately.

55
00:01:57,684 --> 00:01:59,554
I guess at the end
of the day,

56
00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:03,316
I just feel
stressed and anxious
and tired and moody.

57
00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:05,316
[doctor] Well again,
I'm an orthodontist.

58
00:02:05,358 --> 00:02:08,028
I think you probably
wanted Dr. Kozrhaviyani.

59
00:02:08,061 --> 00:02:09,661
She's on the fifth floor.

60
00:02:09,696 --> 00:02:11,226
I'm Dr. Sullivan.

61
00:02:11,264 --> 00:02:13,534
So, I'm not quite sure
how you got us mixed up.

62
00:02:13,567 --> 00:02:16,397
Well, it was a happy accident
because I feel a lot better.

63
00:02:16,436 --> 00:02:17,666
You're very easy to talk to.

64
00:02:17,704 --> 00:02:19,544
Can I see you again
next week?

65
00:02:19,573 --> 00:02:20,743
I suppose.

66
00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:23,744
Are you interested
in teeth straightening?

67
00:02:23,777 --> 00:02:27,377
Well, I guess
the important thing
is that you feel better.

68
00:02:27,414 --> 00:02:31,524
So, how long are you
gonna have braces?

69
00:02:31,551 --> 00:02:33,751
Anywhere from 18 to 24 months,

70
00:02:33,787 --> 00:02:36,957
depending on how good I am
about wearing my rubber bands.

71
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:39,120
I'm... I'm sorry,

72
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:42,129
why do your braces
look so, um, extra shiny?

73
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:43,962
I went with chrome.

74
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:46,727
They offered me clear,
but I'm not looking
to hide my braces.

75
00:02:46,766 --> 00:02:49,296
And there's no shame
in trying to
better yourself.

76
00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:51,436
Go chrome
or go home, baby!

77
00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:53,341
So, what's today's mystery?

78
00:02:54,941 --> 00:02:56,981
I don't know
if I explained it well
in my note,

79
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:58,880
but my old hairstylist Dustin,

80
00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:00,982
had a minor surgery
a couple of months ago

81
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,554
and had to take time off.

82
00:03:02,582 --> 00:03:04,652
So I went to another stylist
in the salon, Anastasia,

83
00:03:04,684 --> 00:03:09,294
and she gave me
the best haircut of my life.

84
00:03:09,322 --> 00:03:11,422
So, just to clarify,

85
00:03:11,458 --> 00:03:13,528
the haircut we're
looking at right now,

86
00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:15,960
this is the... best haircut
of your life?

87
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:17,496
-Yes.
-Mm-kay.

88
00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:18,930
Well, it's a little grown out.

89
00:03:18,965 --> 00:03:20,695
Which is why I need a trim.

90
00:03:20,734 --> 00:03:21,934
The problem is,

91
00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:24,238
I just poked my head in there
and Dustin's back.

92
00:03:24,271 --> 00:03:26,101
But I have an appointment
with Anastasia!

93
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:27,909
I don't know what to do!

94
00:03:27,941 --> 00:03:29,741
If I go back to Dustin,
I know I'm going to
hate my hair.

95
00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:32,506
But if I go with Anastasia,
Dustin will hate me.

96
00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,375
Thank God I talked
to that orthodontist,

97
00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:36,454
because this is just
the type of mystery

98
00:03:36,483 --> 00:03:38,423
that would normally
stress me out.

99
00:03:38,451 --> 00:03:40,891
Um, are you sure
he'll hate you?

100
00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:43,120
'Cause, I mean,
it's just a haircut.

101
00:03:43,156 --> 00:03:44,916
Uh, "just a haircut"?

102
00:03:44,958 --> 00:03:47,188
You know what, Yung,
you can be a real
dumb [bleep] sometimes.

103
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,827
-What?
-I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
That was harsh.

104
00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:51,333
It's probably because
I'm off sugar.

105
00:03:51,364 --> 00:03:53,274
But the honest
to God's truth is

106
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,430
the right haircut
can change your life.

107
00:03:55,468 --> 00:04:00,368
Which is why,
it is so frustrating for me

108
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:01,907
that you insist on
keeping this...

109
00:04:01,941 --> 00:04:06,281
unflattering cabbage-shaped
nothing on your head.

110
00:04:06,313 --> 00:04:08,453
You have a round face!

111
00:04:08,481 --> 00:04:10,981
You need length,
you need layers.

112
00:04:11,017 --> 00:04:15,317
I mean, I don't know why
we're wasting our time
with this dumb bitch,

113
00:04:15,355 --> 00:04:17,085
you're the one that needs
a hair appointment.

114
00:04:17,123 --> 00:04:18,793
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

115
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:20,855
You're probably
not a dumb bitch.

116
00:04:20,894 --> 00:04:22,834
But I am definitely
a sugar addict,

117
00:04:22,862 --> 00:04:25,302
and going cold turkey
was a [bleep] mistake.

118
00:04:25,332 --> 00:04:29,172
Look, my appointment
with Anastasia starts,
like, right now,

119
00:04:29,202 --> 00:04:30,572
so what are we going to do?

120
00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,503
[Pigeon] We are not
going to do anything.

121
00:04:32,539 --> 00:04:34,339
I am going to go inside

122
00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:37,244
and tell the one,
you have an appointment
with the other,

123
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,737
and then we will be done
with this mystery

124
00:04:39,779 --> 00:04:42,879
and I will go to
that Hooters up there,
get sauced

125
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:46,076
and give one of them
busty gals...

126
00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,449
a nice big hot tip.
[chuckles]

127
00:04:49,489 --> 00:04:52,719
Oh, my God. Let me guess,
the tip of your dick?

128
00:04:52,759 --> 00:04:54,389
[Pigeon] No.

129
00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:56,857
I thought, uh, 25%
would be generous?

130
00:05:01,668 --> 00:05:04,498
It wasn't a "minor surgery,"
you heartless [bleep].

131
00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:07,207
That poor man
had testicular cancer.

132
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:08,640
He had a testicle removed

133
00:05:08,675 --> 00:05:10,975
and he starts radiation
on Monday.

134
00:05:11,010 --> 00:05:12,380
[stutters] I didn't know.

135
00:05:12,412 --> 00:05:14,182
I bet you didn't know,

136
00:05:14,214 --> 00:05:16,354
because you've probably
never asked the man
a single question.

137
00:05:16,383 --> 00:05:18,723
Did you know that
he lost his partner

138
00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:21,152
to a drunk driver in 2007?

139
00:05:21,187 --> 00:05:25,917
Did you know that
he hasn't spoken to anyone
in his family since 2003,

140
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:29,259
merely because
he came out as homosexual?

141
00:05:29,295 --> 00:05:33,125
As if that is anything
but an example
of pure courage?

142
00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:34,966
I had no idea.

143
00:05:35,001 --> 00:05:36,001
I'm sorry, team.

144
00:05:36,035 --> 00:05:37,565
But I can't
in good conscience,

145
00:05:37,604 --> 00:05:39,744
participate in the solving
of a mystery

146
00:05:39,773 --> 00:05:42,473
for someone of
such low moral character.

147
00:05:42,509 --> 00:05:44,039
No, I'm sorry.

148
00:05:44,077 --> 00:05:46,037
I can't believe
how selfish I was being.

149
00:05:46,079 --> 00:05:50,009
I am going to cancel
with Anastasia
and stay with Dustin.

150
00:05:50,049 --> 00:05:53,449
Wow. Man, that guy's
been through so much.

151
00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:54,916
Oh, yeah, what guy's that?

152
00:05:54,954 --> 00:05:56,394
Dustin. The hairdresser.

153
00:05:56,423 --> 00:05:58,293
Oh, no, I just
made that all up.

154
00:05:58,324 --> 00:05:59,694
-Wait, what?
-[Yung] Pigeon!

155
00:05:59,726 --> 00:06:01,626
I asked him if I could
use the men's room,

156
00:06:01,661 --> 00:06:03,461
and he started
yammering about

157
00:06:03,496 --> 00:06:06,796
how they don't have
a "men's" bathroom
or a women's bathroom,

158
00:06:06,833 --> 00:06:10,743
they have, get this,
an all-gender bathroom.

159
00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:12,770
So then I asked him,
"Ah, who cares,

160
00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:15,466
how do you get up to
that upper level
where the Hooters is?"

161
00:06:15,508 --> 00:06:17,508
And he said
there's an escalator.

162
00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:18,984
And so I go, "Oh, yeah,

163
00:06:19,012 --> 00:06:21,852
is it an all-gender
escalator?"

164
00:06:21,881 --> 00:06:22,951
[chuckles]

165
00:06:22,982 --> 00:06:25,622
Oh, yeah, [bleep] it,
let's all go.

166
00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:28,522
We solved the mystery.
We deserve a little treat.

167
00:06:29,689 --> 00:06:31,559
Wait, but... what's happening?

168
00:06:31,591 --> 00:06:33,691
Where the [bleep]
is this taking us?

169
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:36,856
[trumpet sounding]

170
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:39,426
-Oh, dear. Oh, no!
-What?

171
00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,726
That's Gabriel
blowing his horn.

172
00:06:41,768 --> 00:06:43,538
They are calling me home.

173
00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:45,270
Good, because I need
to take a shit

174
00:06:45,305 --> 00:06:46,805
and I don't like
public restrooms.

175
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:50,280
Especially not one of those
all-gender bathrooms.

176
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:52,680
Trust me, the ladies
don't like following me

177
00:06:52,712 --> 00:06:55,452
after I've taken a shit
in an all-gender bathroom.

178
00:06:55,482 --> 00:06:57,822
I'm not talking about
our home, Michael.

179
00:06:57,851 --> 00:07:00,291
I'm talking about home-home.

180
00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:01,690
Heaven.

181
00:07:01,721 --> 00:07:03,761
Welcome home, Marquess.

182
00:07:03,790 --> 00:07:05,790
Gabriel, why am I here?

183
00:07:05,825 --> 00:07:08,155
You've been a ghost
long enough, Marquess.

184
00:07:08,194 --> 00:07:10,564
-You've been promoted!
-What... Oh, wait...

185
00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:11,957
Are you... [gasps]

186
00:07:11,998 --> 00:07:13,698
Are you saying what
I think you're saying?

187
00:07:13,733 --> 00:07:15,533
You're gonna get
your wings, Marquess.

188
00:07:15,568 --> 00:07:17,698
Shut up.
Shut the [bleep] up.

189
00:07:17,737 --> 00:07:18,997
Are you [bleep] serious?

190
00:07:19,038 --> 00:07:21,468
Are you being [bleep]
serious right now?

191
00:07:21,508 --> 00:07:22,968
Abso-[bleep]-lutely...

192
00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:24,779
-[screams]
-...[bleep]-serious.

193
00:07:24,811 --> 00:07:26,981
-You earned it, sweetie!
-Oh!

194
00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:28,853
Let's get the rest
of the angels out here.

195
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:31,752
-It's a celebration, after all.
-[Marquess] Oh!

196
00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:34,586
Did you want to blow it?

197
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:36,221
-Did you want to
blow my horn?
-Oh.

198
00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:37,856
[stutters] Oh, I...

199
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:40,021
-No, I can't...
-Come on.

200
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:41,629
Don't be nervous.

201
00:07:41,661 --> 00:07:43,701
You know how to
give a good blow.

202
00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:45,730
Eh, that I do, no complaints.

203
00:07:45,765 --> 00:07:48,625
Okay. Here we go. [inhales]

204
00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:51,668
[trumpet sounds]

205
00:07:51,704 --> 00:07:54,414
-See? There's Azrael.
-[Marquess] Azrael!

206
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:55,640
-Raphael.
-[Marquess] Raphael!

207
00:07:55,675 --> 00:07:57,175
-Sariel.
-[Marquess] Sariel!

208
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:58,610
-Uriel.
-[Marquess] Aww!

209
00:07:58,645 --> 00:07:59,635
You get the point.

210
00:07:59,679 --> 00:08:01,309
[angels] G'day, Marquess.

211
00:08:01,347 --> 00:08:03,077
Good lord, is heaven made up

212
00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:05,776
entirely of the
Thunder From Down Under
all-male revue?

213
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:07,548
Okay now, Marquess,

214
00:08:07,587 --> 00:08:09,917
I'm afraid it's time
for you to say goodbye
to your mates.

215
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:11,856
Wait, you're staying here?

216
00:08:11,891 --> 00:08:13,491
You're not coming
home with us?

217
00:08:13,526 --> 00:08:16,326
Oh... Oh, dear, that's right.

218
00:08:16,362 --> 00:08:18,362
I won't see them again.

219
00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:19,858
Oh, there there,

220
00:08:19,899 --> 00:08:22,069
sweet Yung.
I'll miss you, too.

221
00:08:22,101 --> 00:08:24,871
I always imagined
I'd be at your wedding,

222
00:08:24,904 --> 00:08:27,614
be at the birth
of your first child.

223
00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:29,310
But who are we kidding,

224
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:30,742
none of that's gonna happen

225
00:08:30,777 --> 00:08:35,507
if you don't do something
different with this hair.

226
00:08:35,548 --> 00:08:37,578
My sweet, sweet Michael.

227
00:08:37,617 --> 00:08:40,177
Where do I begin? Ah!

228
00:08:40,219 --> 00:08:41,619
From the moment I--

229
00:08:41,654 --> 00:08:43,124
I'm sorry to
cut you off, Marquess,

230
00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:44,856
but I gotta get back
down to Earth

231
00:08:44,891 --> 00:08:47,031
and take that [bleep]
I was talking about.

232
00:08:47,727 --> 00:08:49,557
[Michael farts]

233
00:08:50,396 --> 00:08:52,226
Pigeon...

234
00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:53,725
Pidge! The Pidge Man...

235
00:08:53,766 --> 00:08:55,166
Shut up and kiss me.

236
00:08:58,538 --> 00:08:59,738
[Marquess moans]

237
00:08:59,772 --> 00:09:01,912
Pigeon! I don't know
what to say.

238
00:09:01,941 --> 00:09:05,911
I never knew you...
had such feelings for me.

239
00:09:05,945 --> 00:09:07,075
I don't!

240
00:09:07,113 --> 00:09:10,183
I don't, it's just
those deeply muscular,

241
00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:14,286
heavily-oiled,
hard-bodied angels

242
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:15,990
got me all horned up.

243
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,922
I mean, you are
all beautiful men.

244
00:09:17,957 --> 00:09:22,187
I would be honored to share
an all-gender bathroom
with any of you.

245
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:25,698
All right,
take it easy, Marquess.

246
00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:28,932
[Pigeon] And I coulda done
without the tongue.

247
00:09:28,968 --> 00:09:31,038
I'm happy for you, Marquess.

248
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:34,870
But to me, you already
were an angel.

249
00:09:38,444 --> 00:09:39,844
-[thunderclap]
-[God] Marquess!

250
00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,579
Oh, that's God now.

251
00:09:41,614 --> 00:09:44,654
Now, remember, Marquess,
no one can see
the face of God.

252
00:09:44,684 --> 00:09:47,554
-[gasps]
-It is a light too pure
and beautiful to witness.

253
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,147
So, close your eyes,

254
00:09:49,188 --> 00:09:51,918
for he who looks
upon God's face
shall be no more.

255
00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:54,628
-[thunderclap]
-[God] Marquess!

256
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:57,499
[sighs]

257
00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:59,000
I'm really gonna miss him.

258
00:09:59,032 --> 00:10:00,432
-Oh, yeah, who's that?
-[Mike] Get outta the way!

259
00:10:00,466 --> 00:10:02,826
Every all-gender bathroom
was taken down there,

260
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:05,539
and I can't hold it
much longer! [farts]

261
00:10:05,571 --> 00:10:07,171
[angelic vocalization]

262
00:10:12,879 --> 00:10:14,709
[Mike] Marquess,
where's the bathroom?

263
00:10:14,747 --> 00:10:16,577
Michael, shut your eyes!

264
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,716
You're in
the presence of God!

265
00:10:18,751 --> 00:10:21,621
Ooh, it feels so good!

266
00:10:22,221 --> 00:10:23,391
I feel you, God!

267
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:24,963
I love you, God!

268
00:10:24,991 --> 00:10:28,661
[God gasps] I've never seen
my face before.

269
00:10:28,695 --> 00:10:31,325
I'm so beautiful!

270
00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:32,634
[explosion]

271
00:10:33,900 --> 00:10:36,030
[wind whistling]

272
00:10:41,874 --> 00:10:44,744
-Marquess! What happened?
-Nothing. Nothing.

273
00:10:44,777 --> 00:10:46,837
I just... Just didn't want
to be an angel.

274
00:10:46,879 --> 00:10:48,249
Swear to God.

275
00:10:48,281 --> 00:10:50,011
Okay, or, you know,
swear to... whatever.

276
00:10:50,049 --> 00:10:51,419
Let's get the [bleep]
outta here.

277
00:10:51,451 --> 00:10:53,451
Oh, maybe we can stop
in that department store

278
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:56,016
and see about getting me
a new pair of sweatpants,

279
00:10:56,055 --> 00:10:57,885
because I took
a shit in these.

280
00:11:00,593 --> 00:11:03,033
[rumbling]

281
00:11:05,364 --> 00:11:07,904
[theme music playing]